Thinkings
Seachange
03:31
The curse wears the name of routine and moves quietly into your life under the promise of plenty. It brings things that shine; Useless pretty things that you learn to covet, to yearn, ultimately at the expense of all else. You lure yourself, "Surely life would be sweeter with more useless shiny things". In return all you must trade is more of your life. More precious wasted hours laid down to that cruel master: Routine.
Winter wears long and routine wears me thin. Endless days of unending shifts, endured with little enthusiasm and to little effect. One day resembles the next and I often ask myself, what difference do I make? Surely this daily toil must incrementally improve this world. Those around me seem to think so, they see their place and value. But they too wear that sadness in their eyes. That same shade of loss worn with the uniform but not so easily removed.
Things shouldn't be like this...they can't stay like this. Things won't stay like this.
I know each find our own joy in life. These shiny garish corporate eye shades I'm currently wearing all but block the sun. But I remind myself it is still out there. I remember a time I wore its warmth across my back. I squinted, but I smiled as well.
Its been a year now that I've returned to my old life. It was always going to be difficult and mark my words it has been.
However, now it is time for a change. I've amassed shiny things that reflect and glint. But they are a poor imitation of the real riches of the world. Instead of these expensive shiny things, give me sunlight glinting on the water. Instead of fine leather, let me wear my own skin toughened under the sun.
I yearn for that memory where the only brand I wore was my own name
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